The Rant

1/19/12 Set List at Bar 4

2012-01-20T07:30:00.000-08:00

Last night I had a totally awesome show at Bar 4 in Park Slope Brooklyn.
Thank you to everyone who made the night so very special.

The set list was as follows

(Kalimba)
1. Louise (unreleased/O&E1)
2. The Bottle (unreleased/O&E1)

(piano)
3. Sally (unreleased/O&E1)
4. Narcissus Sea (unreleased/O&E1)
5. The Seaman's Wharf * (unreleased/O&E1)

(a capella)
6. Flapjacks (unreleased/SRATS)

(guitar)
7. Lemon Scented (S.O.B.)
8. Follow Me Home (S.O.B.)
9. Sirens of Brooklyn (S.O.B.)
10. Mr. Carpentier (unplug single/SRATS)
11. Fishnet Sailor (S.O.B.)
12. Before You Go (S.O.B.)
13. Banana Leaves (unreleased/O&E1)

*=premiere/first time performed live
S.O.B = from the album Sirens of Brooklyn
SRATS = from the unreleased album Sunrise at the Speakeasy (coming 2012)
O&E1 = from The Ocean & The Easel (part 1)
unplug = unplug single

Moneyless Music: White Xmas/Xmas Bells

2011-12-15T14:23:00.000-08:00

Free Download!

Last year, I recorded two songs in my home studio for the lovely Wanda Wisdom's Christmas Special.

The tracks were written, recorded and mixed over the course of only a couple days.
If i remember correctly, her instructions were to give her something that was somewhere
between Burl Ives and John Waters. I'd like to think I succeeded.
These short ditties are downright filthy, so parental advisory kiddies.

Xmas Bells/White Xmas by robertgermanmusic

2012 - A Musical Odyssey a.k.a. my last year in the USA

2011-12-15T14:12:00.000-08:00

...Coming Soon.

A Rant from the Past

2011-12-15T11:10:00.000-08:00

Occasionally I stumble upon an article that reminds me of something I posted years ago. So, today I present two articles.

The Cellphone is the New Cigarette - The Rant 2006

&

Technology is the New Smoking - TechCrunch 2011

sort of but not quite a new year's resolution

2011-12-02T13:35:00.000-08:00

So, I don't really do new year's resolutions, but this year I am going to try to commit to a few things. This may be a bit ambitious, so don't flog me if I fail on some account.

1. Release of Sunrise at the Speakeasy in 2012 (finally)

2. Finish studio recordings of the following unreleased songs:

The Ocean & The Easel Part 1 :The Ocean

-Wash Away
-Sally
-Banana Leaves
-The Seaman's Wharf
-Fishes & Birds
-Chicken of the Sea (taste like chicken)
-Mister Octopus (yes, that is the title)
-Portuguese Man of War
-The Bottle
-The Siren
-The Ocean & The Easel

The Ocean & The Easel Part 2: The Easel
-Digitized
-Western Front
-Daddy
-Cherry Falls
-600 Miles
-Pretty Decent Guy
-After the Apocalypse
-God in The Telephone Book
-Single File
-Down So Low
-Big from Down Here/Sirens of Brooklyn (ballad version)
-The Famine & The Flood
-Act Like a Girl

3. Move to Canada.

There you have it.

Lotsa Love

R

Things I didn't say It's probably for the best The gimpy edition

2011-09-16T06:26:00.000-07:00

I was weighed down carrying two bags this morning and was diverted into a small pathway due to a construction area. I passed a woman and she turned around and started screaming at me.

"What's the matter with you? You can't walk in a straight line?"

5 years ago I had an accident and consequently I walk with a slight limp. It's not something I often talk about. It doesn't so much make me feel deformed or less able, however it is more promounced with I carry bags or heavy awkward things.
In this situation I chose to keep walking as though I didn't hear the woman.

A tiny voice in my head however screemed "I was in an accident and walk with a fucking limp. What's your excuse for being a nasty cunt?"

please pardon the foul language of the little voice in my head most especially its use of the "c" word. I mean no disrespect to women by its usage here. I know how distasteful it is and thus, it's probably for the best that the little voice remained in my head, though now it's had its say on my blog as well.

Sigh.

NPR: First Listen Tori Amos - Night of Hunters

2011-09-13T14:12:00.000-07:00

I haven't had a chance to listen to this yet, but I thought I'd post now and give opinions later. The new Tori Amos album Night of Hunters is now streaming on NPRs website. Go forth and listen!

NPR - First Listen: St. Vincent

2011-09-05T10:25:00.000-07:00

NPR has really been doing a great job of making me happy by streaming the albums
of some of my favorite musicians before the release dates. Being a child who couldn't
resist shaking the presents before Christmas Day, this is something with makes me exceedingly happy.

You can have a listen to St. Vincent's Strange Mercy in its entirety over on NPR's
website.

Enjoy! The album is scheduled for a September 13th release date.

Fallout Friday - The Nuclear Edition

2011-09-02T07:17:00.000-07:00

There are certain questions which keep finding their way into my thought patterns.
This is one that has circled around for a while.

Why is the U.S.A. seemingly in charge of policing nuclear weapons worldwide when it is the only country which has actually used nuclear weapons against other human beings?

As you ponder this question, I leave you with a very literal video for Ani DiFranco's "The Atom" made by a fan and posted to Youtube. Happy Friday! Enjoy.

Diversions - Hygiene with Amy Sedaris

2011-09-01T16:47:00.000-07:00

Amy Sedaris has always been my hero.
Whenever I'm a little down
I know that she's there
to help put things into perspective.
She also teaches me things...
important things like hygiene.

A pair of (eat my) shorts on September's Out Radio

2011-08-31T11:21:00.000-07:00

J.D. Doyle is the foremost historian of queer music.
His knowledge is unrivaled. Not only is he a staunch supporter
of Out artists and their works, but he is also just a really nice guy.

I had the pleasure of meeting J.D. back in 2006 when I had the honor of recording an intro to accompany my song Marlboro man for his program.

This month, you can hear two songs in my eat my shorts series being played on the september edition of Out Radio. There are many talented musicians, too many to name with whom I share this honor.

Head over to JD's site and check out the playlist where you can also
listen to the program.

moneyless Music - Robert Recommends - Royksopp/The Irrepressibles Free Download

2011-08-31T07:22:00.000-07:00

The Irrepressibles have been on my musical radar for a while now thanks
to their introduction by the lovely Gilles-Mathieu Laberge, my friend up north in Montréal.

The Scandi (Norwegian Electronica) group Royksopp has put their own subtle but lovely twist on the track In This Shirt, which is now downloadable from their site.

Get it here for Free!

Also, if you haven't seen the music video from Pag directed by Roy Raz (non official) for the same song, I highly recommend you give it a looksy. Pure eye candy.

Eat My Shorts - Volume 4 - Bootylicious

2011-07-23T12:11:00.000-07:00

Robert German - Eat My Shorts - Volume 4: Bootylicious by robertgermanmusic

Robert German - Eat My Shorts - Volume 3: The West Virginia Bath Salt Blues

2011-05-23T06:47:00.001-07:00

Robert German - Eat My Shorts - Volume 3: The West Virginia Bath Salt Blues by robertgermanmusic

This 2 Shall Pass - Rehearsal 4.28.11

2011-05-03T10:00:00.000-07:00

Yes, I'm wearing Pajama pants, a scarf and a took.
This is just a bit of footage from a laid back rehearsal
on 4.28.11. This 2 Shall Pass.

We will be posting video clips regularly from here on out.
Please subscribe to the official Youtube channel to be kept up to
date when things are posted.

The NarcissusSea (lyrics)

2011-04-08T08:25:00.000-07:00

Metamorphisis of Narcissus by Salvador Dali (1937)

oh the man
he loved his reflection
it's rippled perfection
the ebb and flow of
oh god, I love me so much

oh the man
his body contorting
an image distorting
when the tide goes out
there'll be nothing left of him

In the Narcissus si sis us Sea
In the Narcisus si sis us Sea
The Narcissus si sis us
Narcisus si sis sis

The sailors all have mirrors on their sails
and the dolphins all have cameras on their tails
the lobster's selling lipstick to the walruses and whales
and the clams have many secrets they could sell

in the narcissus si sis us Sea
in the narcissus si sis us Sea
the narcissus si sis us Sea

Eat My Shorts - Volume 2: Nerdy Boy

2011-03-22T11:24:00.000-07:00

Eat My Shorts - A New Series

2011-03-07T06:53:00.000-08:00

People used to communicate through long flowery letters whilst musicians wrote elaborate pieces, movements, symphonies even ring cycles. Oh how times have changed.

micro blogging, tweeting, music released as single tracks connected to no album. OMG, LOL, WTF, TTYS, ROTFL! XOXO

Though I have a special love for a thought out well crafted album, where the songs flow together and work as one harmonious piece of art, I also have a special adoration for very short songs. I realized that I have many songs which are less than a minute, which I may never expand beyond that length.

So without further ado, I present a series which I will attempt to refresh once a week.

Eat my shorts, bite-size demos for the attention deficit disordered masses.

I hope you enjoy.

a note about volume 1. This was a silly improv that I just created on the fly to test out a new microphone. All tracks were 1 take with minimal editing. It is what it is. The image you see was taken using a diana f+ 120 film camera w/ 100 iso redscale film, extended exposure of atlantic avenue subway station while a train was pulling into the platform.

the end is nigh

2011-01-11T07:21:00.001-08:00

I woke this morning to this song playing on repeat in my head.
This is obviously undeniable evidence that the end is nigh.

The ominous word snowpocalypse has been bandied about
lately as the latest mot du jour. Birds have been falling from the sky and Florida airports have closed to move their runways to accomodate the shifting magnetic north pole. Coincidence? I think not. Well, perhaps some sort
of cataclysm is on the horizon. God Help us All.

When the evil white flakes of death fall this evening to destroy our collective existence, don't
say I didn't warn you.

The Beginning. The End.

2011-01-10T13:36:00.000-08:00

K and I started watching Buffy The Vampire Slayer on Netflix over the summer. I must admit that I used to kind of laugh in my head at people who watched this show. It seemed rather silly to me, but alas, we got sucked in and not only have we derived guilty pleasure from watching it, but we managed to watch every episode but the final three, which we marathoned last night. I had been working for 9 hours straight on a track called Sally (demo here) for the third album The Ocean & The Easel. My brain, eyes and soul were fried, so distraction was very welcome.

Saturday marked the beginning of the recording process for this album and was consumed by 12 hours of vocal takes. Don't get too excited yet as this is a double album which I am recording in self-imposed hermitage, so the likelihood of an impending (soonish) release is not high. I dove head first into music and pretty much stayed there for the duration. By the end of the day I felt completely frustrated and wanted to just delete every audio file, which is the typical feeling I get when starting anything, but I hope to get into my groove soon enough.

I balanced the 12 hours of work with 12 hours of sleep Saturday night. I jumped right into gear on Sally as soon as my feet hit the floor Sunday morning (noon). well, I kind of stepped on a piece of glass and bled all over the place, but after I cleaned my wound and stopped the bleeding, I was hard at work.
Sunday was a new day and brought with it a more optimistic approach. I worked on editing for 9 hours. I know I accomplished much, but I am impatient and always wish things would go more quickly and most of what I had to do was tedious work. K cooked me a lovely dinner and we vegetated for our Buffy marathon and then curled up in bed. However, I felt unsettled and could not sleep. I stayed up until 3 in the morning editing and pondering.

Tonight I trudge forward.

Unplug -The Music Video

2010-12-09T11:24:00.000-08:00

Today is the official US/World release of Unplug aka the Australian Music video.
It is the creation of the very talented Simon Trevorrow.

I hope you enjoy it.

I express my love with Pork

2010-11-12T07:44:00.001-08:00

Last night I went and bought a 10 pound ham and took over the kitchen with a fit of frenzy. I prepared the ham in the tradition of my people, which involves pineapple slices and brown sugar.

Unsatisfied that ham alone is the full embodiment of comfort, I peeled, boiled and mashed potatoes with generous additions of butter, cream, salt and pepper.

I got some of those big foil roasting pans and prepared everything to take upstairs to Isaiah's grandmother. She was not home, which ulimately was a good thing as it gave the ham time to cool from third-degree-burn-straight-out-of-the-oven temperature to warm and ready to eat.

I heard the sound of people walking around which meant that someone was home.
When I got to the door, the next door neighbor saw me and just opened the door.

I walked into an apartment full of older women in flowered dresses all scuttling about. Isaiah's grandmother was not there, but one of the ladies helped me carry everything to the kitchen and then I departed. I hope that the ham goes to good use. I know it's hard to think of food when grieving, but I just hope that my love expressed through pork will warm their souls a bit.

Celebrating a Life/Losing Isaiah

2010-11-11T07:23:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was K's birthday. We celebrated in grand style with a dinner of seafood namely our luxurious crustacean friend, mister Lobster. We then gathered with the lovely KL, DD and LMO for drinks. I feel very blessed to have K in my life and am
thankful that he was born and is alive and well. I could not have asked for
a better soul mate. I am truly blessed.

We were making our way back home, opening the apartment door when we ran into our friend Emma who lives one floor directly above us. She was on her way to the hospital. Her grandson Isaiah had been hit by a car and she informed us that he was unconscious. I could see the pain and distress in her eyes. I could sense the shock and I had a hard time taking in what she was saying. I tried to continue the acknowledgement/celebration of K's birthday, but I couldn't stop thinking about Isaiah.

We went about our evening trying not to think about Isaiah and finally went to bed.

This morning we woke to the sound of someone ringing our doorbell. K got up to answer it as I was still bleery-eyed and not yet ready to greet the morning. As soon as he opened the door, I could hear her cries "He's gone. He's gone" Everything else was muffled unintelligible echos swelling in the hallway. Konstantine returned to bed asking if I had heard and if I knew what she had said. I said I didn't think I wanted to know. He confirmed that I had heard correctly. He's gone.

Isaiah was 13 years old. He was a musician, a writer, a very special little man who
always addressed me by name and looked me in the eyes. He had kind eyes and a soul that glowed beyond his skin. There was something wise about him, an old soul. Isaiah had trouble walking due to being born with spina bifida. I'm not sure if this in part led to the tragic accident. I don't know all the details. I just know that he is gone and that his family now grieves. I find myself filled with overwhelming sadness to know that he died so young. He had many songs and stories to write that will go unwritten.

It is a tragedy like this that makes one really appreciate life and the loved ones we have. Every day could be our last and every moment is so important.

Isaiah, I am so sorry that you did not get to do everything you planned to do in this life. I hope that you are at peace. You will be missed.

I now find myself trying to decide what best food to cook for his family.
I know it's not exclusively a southern thing, but most of my upbringing being in the south, there is some automatic caserole instinct that kicks in and takes over. It is my knee jerk reaction to tragedy that I must turn the oven on. I must cook.

The Bottle(Lyrics)

2010-08-30T19:52:00.000-07:00

To all the ones we left behind
who pray for us at supper time
and hang their clothes out on the line
and watch the time as it slips away

I hope you read these words I wrote,
a sentimental scrolled up note.
I threw the bottle
watched it float
then I watched it til it disappeared.

Beside the water stands a man
he holds a bottle in his hand
he pops the cork
wipes off the sand
he reads the words
but doesn't understand.

A tiny ship that doesn't float
its sails made from a crumpled note
and balsa wood and superglue
in a bottle that has sailed the blue.

It sits there on the mantle top
the logs shift and the fire pops
the ocean breeze, the ticking clock
a final breath
a heartbeat stops

Free Download of the Week- Fishnet Sailor

2010-08-18T07:33:00.000-07:00

<a href="http://robertgerman.bandcamp.com/track/fishnet-sailor">Fishnet Sailor by Robert German</a>

2010-08-05T11:44:00.001-07:00

Thunder Down Under!

2010-07-16T12:16:00.000-07:00

No, this is not the sound that my thighs make when I walk too briskly, but rather, well me trying to be cute, so sue me. Good luck with suing me btw, because that will about as financially fruitless a pursuit as trying to squeeze blood out of a bag of rocks.

So, anyway...
THUNDER DOWNUNDER!
Sounds kind of scary when you use CAPS and !!!!

So, anyway...
There are afterall samples of thunder in my song Unplug and Australia is referred to as "down under" thus thunder down under and some exciting news.

The music video for Unplug which was shot in Australia and directed by Simon Trevorrow premiered on ABC in Australia on Rage. The video is also currently a featured video on their website.

For now, this is the only place where you can watch the video as the Australian premiere and the US premiere are not in sync with each other, but that's ok. They're quite a few hours ahead of us and the video was born there, so it seems fitting tha they should see it first. Don't worry North America, Your day of glory will come soon enough.

Just an FYI, when I stated that the video premiered on ABC, I'm not referring to that Disney network but rather referring to the Australian Broadcasting Corporation. Think PBS or BBC but for Australia.

Robert Recommends/Diversions- Janelle Monáe

2010-07-08T12:51:00.000-07:00

There is something quite special about 24 year old Janelle Monáe.
From her funky dykie black tie style to her James Brown and Michael Jackson
infused moves, I like this kid. She's got spunk and this song is like crack for your ears.

For Granted

2010-07-07T07:14:00.000-07:00

I am a spoiled person.
I know this. It is something that also
makes me a difficult person at times.

I have this need or desire to
have things surrounding me in just the
right orchestration of space and sound.

Some people might call this selfishness.
perhaps they are right. I do think there
is an arrogance to it, that reeks of men
with their wars and mistakes.

I falter as a person on a daily basis
on so many levels. I feel at times like an utter
failure. Today I think is perhaps the penacle of that for me.

A moment when I wish I were a better person.
A moment when I come to realize that I take
so much in my life that is so precious for granted.
Yes, I think it is selfishness, arrogance, all those things.

The taste of it is rotting in my guts.
It makes my stomach cramp.

Diversions (Trouble)

2010-07-07T06:55:00.000-07:00

This video and song seem to be speaking to me at the moment.

Wash Away (partial lyrics)

2010-07-06T14:16:00.000-07:00

The man upstairs
is driving me crazy
pouring water
into the walls

and I'm grabbing napkins
towels
buckets
umbrellas
so I'll be ready
when the rain begins to fall.

Are you ready
for the water
are you ready
to wash away

The water keeps rising
every morning
but no one in town knows the reason why
and I had a dream that the buildings were islands
and that the ocean swallowed the sky.

Are you ready
for the water
are you ready
to wash away

Louise (lyrics)

2010-07-04T17:54:00.000-07:00

At the bottom of the ocean
there's a woman named Louise.
You have to kiss her if you want to live
It's the only way to breathe.

Her mood shifts like the water
her eyes are cold like butter.
her lips are hot like pepper so
they burn you when you kiss her.

Louise's husband left her
one night while she was sleeping.
It's hard to see from under water
but Louise is always weeping.

This used to be a desert
many years ago.
She used to be so happy before
the tears began to flow.

There used to be a garden,
the only one for miles.
she sowed the seeds and pulled the weeds
and did it with a smile.

but her tears turned into puddles
and puddles turned to rivers
rivers turn to lakes and oceans
fishing towns and swimmers.

and at the bottom of the ocean
there's a woman named Louise
You have to kiss her if you want to live
It's the only way to breathe.

Don't Panic

2010-07-01T17:05:00.001-07:00

Well,

It's officially been months since I've had a panic attack
or had to pop a litte white pill to get through the day.
This is a good thing. Songs have been flowing forth like water
from a spring I was worried was about to dry up. Many things are brewing
live shows, music videos, multiple albums, christmas songs (yes, I know it's early)
so stay tuned.

Lotsa Love

R

Old Man

2010-06-29T19:09:00.000-07:00

I'm already an old man
nobody cares what an old man has to say
even if he walked 10 miles in the snow
uphill
both ways

The Drain/Ghosts

2010-05-11T12:36:00.000-07:00

Life seems to be comprised of cycles, a swirling pool that spins round and round until you're finally sucked down the drain. Perhaps you hang on like a hairball until someone calls a plumber to clear the path you are blocking. Wow, doesn't that sound so delightfully pleasant? Each revolution round the whirlpool seems to bring me back to a time and place and/or to a person. They are older each time and a bit further from the glitter of our inital introduction. We don't fully recoginize each another. The whirlpool spins us round another time. Each time, the original picture fades a bit, until all is black

I went through a rough patch a few years back and that's putting it lightly. I'm generally more prone to exageration than understatement, but for this paragraph, I shall embrace subtelty. This rough patch if you will was a very specific bubble of existence for me with a group of people, a drinking problem (aka drowning your sorrows) and a feeling of death. I died inside. My life ended but my feet kept moving and my heart kept beating, but make no mistake that I died in 2003. Ok I'm back to exageration. Was it 2003? I'm not quite sure. It's all a blur at this point.

"You left my ass in Arizona with 15 bucks and half a corona" and needless to say, I ran into your ass on the street the other day and I cringed with every uncomfortable muscle in my body. You smiled like it was good to see me. You are so oblivious. It is not nor will it ever be good to see you.

So please, if you see me on the street, there is no need for a hello, because I am a toddler crawling through my second life. You are a ghost from my first. There are good memories that wash down the drain with the bad, but that which as gone down the drain is not meant to return. It drifts away to the sewer or the water treatment plant. Perhaps it shall live again in a glass of drinking water or an ice cube.

Now, I... I was reborn in 2007

God In The Telephone Book (live)

2010-03-17T07:13:00.000-07:00

I had the privelage of sharing the stage with the very lovely Amy Clarke
at Sidewalk Cafe last month for a benefit concert she did for the victims
of the quake in Haiti. Amy is an extremely talented musician friend who used to
live in New York but alas, she left us for the left coast. She is missed.
Here is a clip of an improv version of God in The Telephone book, a yet to be release song of mine. Hope you enjoy.

R

Lemon Scented in the dark

2010-03-17T07:03:00.000-07:00

I randomly stumbled upon this clip of me performing Lemon Scented in Montréal Canada in October of last year. The funny thing is that you can't really see me or the audience. It was a "secret show", so I guess the very obscured nature of this clip is rather appropriate. haha.

Diversions- Mad at the Dirt

2010-03-16T12:19:00.000-07:00

This diversion is dedicated to the wonderful Mister Jason S. of D.U.M.B.O. Brooklyn and comes courtesy of the Yeast Radio where it recently was used as the opening song.
In case you are unfamiliar with that filth, Yeast Radio is a very twisted and slightly "racist"-for-"racist"-sake podcast that features True Dooty, the highlarious highjinx of the whorishly nasty Cheryl Merkowski.
I shouldn't admit that I listen to this grum, but I must admit that I'm rather addicted to it and the envelope pushing it employs.

Anyhoo. here's The Joans with Mad at the dirt. enjoy.

God in The Telephone Book- Lyrics

2010-03-15T11:36:00.000-07:00

She met buddah on a downtown train
He said baby let me ease our pain
so she crossed her legs and she meditated when she could.

She met a friar with fleeting hair.
He said baby let me take you there so she
spread her legs in an abbey by the wood.
yes she did yes she did.

She found light wherever she looked.
She found light wheverer she looked.

She and lucifer had some tea.
He said baby won't you live with me.
I've got a killer view and the heat is free
no broker's fee.

So she sold her soul and she bought some shoes.
Good things always come in toes. She sang in red
where she used to sing in blue.
yes she did yes she did yes she did.

She found light wherever she looked.
She found light wherever she looked.

She and lucifer said goodbye.
She couldn't live with the heat so high.
She said you'd be surprised.
He's a real nice guy.

So she drove her car through the bible belt.
She thought she might find god there, she felt,
but the more she drove, the more like hell it smelled.
yes it did yes it did yes it did.

She found light wherever she looked.
She found light wherever she looked.
She found god in the telephone book.

The Delicate Butterfly

2010-03-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

It is odd for me to think of myself as delicate or fragile, a butterfly that so easily can be squashed by a careless foot or hand. Alas, it is lately how I feel. Last week, after months of doing very well, I found myself once again rushing to see the doctor, thinking I was having a heart attack. They again did an EKG and again told me my vital signs were normal and that I am suffering from panic disorder. The only solution they have for something like that of course is pills...the kind that make you feel like you're walking underwater with a skull full of jello. I have been trying to live in the now and not imagine a vast array of tragic future scenarios that send my mind racing in circles and my heart pounding out of my chest. It is not easy for me. I think I need to be reprogrammed, taken into a room where some very congenial lady in a white coat can show me pictures of smiling people and kittens and sunshine and pumpkin patches and infuse my brain with the imagery it needs to relax and just be ok with everything.
Perhaps it's time for me to finally have that lobotamy I've been saving up for. Perhaps they can reach into my head and scoop out the parts that have me on tip toes balancing on pins and needles like a circus animal, gritting my teeth with every breath.
perhaps...

being visited by the ghosts of the living while wearing JFK Junior's shoes

2010-03-12T07:45:00.000-08:00

A few days ago, on our way to the grocery store, Konstantine and I encountered an older Caribbean woman, as is a fairly regular occurance in our neighborhood. The woman was sort of babbling something and staring at the ground and Konstantine thought she was talking to him, so he responded to her. She responded by saying "not you, him" and pointed at my shoes. She went off on an entire rant about John F. Kennedy Junior and how he used to wear shoes just like mine. I just sort of smiled and nodded, responding "yes, they're great shoes. I love them". She said something like "he was really good to us" and then wandered off down the street. Just to be clear, the shoes being mentioned are two toned black and white saddle oxfords, so it's understandable that they might evoke more attention than a tennis shoe or plain black shoe.

In completely unrelated news, I have been visited in my sleep twice this week by the ghosts of living canadian musicians. First, it was Patrick Watson and then it was Joni Mitchell. Joni had this really cool guitar pedal in the shape of a high heal shoe and made me do a session of sing-a-long with her. I don't know what this all means, but hey at least it's interesting.

Sally (a demo) - sneak sneak peek available for listening til March 16th

2010-03-10T06:44:00.000-08:00

In the murky waters of my mind has been a project titled "The Ocean & The Easel".
The best way I can describe it is that it is a soundtrack to a sort of movie musical that is nautically themed. Recently I've been working on a demo for one song from that project in my studio at home. Here is a preview which I will leave up for a week and then it will magically disappear. Yes, it's based on a children's tongue twister. Yes. I may have lost my mind.

***Alas, the time has expired on this sneak peak.

currently on the turntable- Harry Belafonte sings of the Caribbean

2010-03-09T12:36:00.000-08:00

One of the things that I love about vinyl records (besides the sound)
is that many songs that were originally released on vinyl were never transferred
to CD or the digital realm. Typically you can find an artist's greatest hits
and their very popular albums, but when you buy an old record, your ears get treated
to musical gems that many people haven't heard in years if ever at all.

The most recent addition to my vinyl collection falls into that category. It has never been released on itunes.
It is Harry Belafonte sings of the caribbean, released in 1957 and in perfect condition. Here's one of the other things I love about vinyl. I bought the entire album for $3 from a guy selling vinyl out of a paper box on 7th avenue.

In these tough economic times, you can't beat the price.

Robert Recommends: Patty Griffin's Downtown Church

2010-03-09T07:44:00.000-08:00

My history with organized Christianity is a sordid one, or rather one littered with guilt and pain. As the great Tori Amos once sang "I've got enough guilt to start my own religion". It has taken me years of healing to separate my issues with organized religion from the power and beauty of gospel music.

Patty Griffin is an incomparable songwriter and has enough soul to be her own church choir. So, it makes sense that she should do a gospel album and let me just say that after listening to it a few times through, I think my soul has been save. hallelujah.

Patty Griffin's Website

The Rant Book Club Selection for March

2010-03-05T08:48:00.000-08:00

Setlist

2010-03-05T07:23:00.000-08:00

On Sunday I had the privilege of being part of a group of artists who gathered in Greenpoint Brooklyn to create a local music record store and performance space for one day. It was truly a magical event called Mayfly which was organized in part by a very lovely musician friend of mine by the name of Lara Ewen. Lara and I met a couple years back while I was on tour. We did a show in Worcester Massachusetts and have stayed friends ever since.

The sense of community and love that I felt at the Mayfly event was amazing.
I got such a warm reception from everyone and also got to see some very talented musicians perform as well. We all did short sets so it was like a musical buffet for all to enjoy.

My set was as follows:

1. Walking Song
2. Mister Carpentier
3. God in The Telephone Book (vocal experimental version)
4. Lemon Scented

You can read more about the awesome event called Mayfly
by going to their blog.

Diversions: Joanna Newsom

2010-03-05T06:55:00.000-08:00

Lately I have found my fingers tickling the ivories quite a bit, so to speak.
I have no formal training on piano, nor have I ever performed anything live
on any form of keyboard.
I have been quietly working on my third album whilst my second album is still in that
netherworld between completion and release into the world. The third album is an ocean themed soundtrack for a movie musical that only exists in some strange place in my head.

The two tracks that have been holding the majority of my focus are titled "Sally" and "The Seaman's Warf". In the next week, I will try to post a little snippet of Sally for your listening pleasure(hopefully pleasure)....

Until then, keeping with my ocean themed brain, here's an artist who has been starting to seep into my conciousness, a rather unique harpist/songwriter/etc by the name of Joanna Newsom with her song "Clam, Crab, Cockle, Cowrie"

Diversions: Brazil edition

2010-01-13T12:24:00.000-08:00

This afternoon is sponsored by Brazil and a crazy tranny who should be an inspiration to us all.
Don't give up on your dreams, even if you have to rip the wig right off a ho to
acheive the crown.

My Heart goes out to Haiti

2010-01-13T10:05:00.001-08:00

In the blink of an eye everything can change.
It is a delicate line that we tread with nature.

Yesterday, a Magnitude 7 earthquake rocked the very foundation of Haiti.
Killing 100,000 people, according to Haiti's prime minister.

"The largest earthquake to hit Haiti in more than 200 years rocked the Caribbean nation Tuesday, collapsing a hospital and heavily damaging other buildings. U.S. officials reported bodies lying in the streets and an aid official described "total disaster and chaos." -AP

My heart goes out to those who have died, lost loved ones, lost homes, etc.
So sad...

Currently on the turntable- Fame Monster

2010-01-12T13:45:00.000-08:00

As many of you know, I puchase music almost exclusively on vinyl if it is available in that format. For me, personally, I find that the sound is much warmer and less processed sounding. MP3's never really sound fully right to me, like listening to a mosaic of an image instead of a crisp clear picture.

I do not typically listen to a great deal of pop music and generally couldn't tell you what songs or artists are popular or what their songs are. There are some exeptions. I don't hate pop music. It has its place. Sometimes I want a steak and sometimes I want bubblegum.

Currently on the turntable is a xmas gift from Konstantine, Lady Gaga's Fame Monster on picture vinyl. I must say that as steak flavored bubblegum goes, I'm enjoying it.

Robert Recommends: I Like You

2010-01-12T11:44:00.000-08:00

I got a wonderful Christmas gift from K that has brought me a great deal of joy.
It helped me to laugh while angry midwestern women with bad hair were gnashing their teeth and complaining as we sat through 2 delays that left us sitting on the runway for 2 1/2 hours during our trek home from Kansas. (more about that another time) I did almost strangle a woman with my bare hands, but thanks to the humorous musings on entertaining from the lovely Amy Sedaris, said woman triumphed to live and complain another day.

If you haven't seen Strangers with Candy, her derganged sit-com that used to be on comedy central, then you haven't lived. If you have seen it and love her off kilter brand of humor, then you will adore this book.

Don't take my word for it though.

Buy the Book
Visit Amy's Website

Pine Mouth

2010-01-12T08:40:00.000-08:00

image randomly stolen from the internet following a google search. uncredited, so sue me.

"WHAT?"You may be asking yourself is pine mouth?

It is not some after-effect of chewing on a pinecone or a post holiday sydrome brought about by humping the Christmas tree. It may sound like a joke or a made-up phrase or some sort of sister to the dreaded pot smoker's cotton mouth, but I assure you that pine mouth is none of these things and is yet very serious business.

I will share my story with you today. Hopefully, my tale of bitter whoa will help to spare you from the agony that I suffered. Like countless others, I fell victim to this dreaded condition for almost two weeks, just in time for christmas dinner. Our stories are countless. Many of us suffer in silence, in the shadows. Today I step into the light to speak of my tribulation.

A few weeks ago, We received an early Christmas gift from my mother. It was a cuisinart griddler, a great tool in the making of panini, the Italian grilled glamour sandwich. I was so exciited that I ran to whole foods and bought a bunch of pine nuts to make pesto along with an assortment of cheeses, sun dried tomatoes and ecoutrement to immerse myself body and soul into the ancient art of panini.

I should mention that the bag of pinenuts I purchased was rather large. When I got home, I began ecstatically chopping up the garlic, basil and pine nuts for my pesto (using this recipe). I was hungry, which is a constant state for me. My pet tape worm felix requires constant attention, and I generally oblige. I shoved a handful of pinenuts into my mouth and gobbled them down. One handful led to two, led to three, led to....well, six. Ok. I'm a pig. I gorged myself on pinenuts and then ate a panini with lots of pesto on it. K and Laura did not consume the quantity of pine nuts that I did, but they did enjoy the luxurious lusciousness of my homemade pesto on their sandwiches.

In an ideal world my story would end here, with a full belly and a happily ever after and maybe a Post script titled "midnight bacon snack". Alas, dear readers, my story begins two days after my flirtation with panini and my glutenous mouth affair with the temptress known as pine nut.

On Thursday morning (2 days after panini) I woke up and grabbed my morning cup of coffee. When I took my first sip, it tasted, well, off. It was bitter and rotten tasting. I just thought perhaps my corner coffee shop had made a bad batch or something. Lunch time rolled around and I took a bight of my lunch. It tasted bitter, mettalic and rotten. I began to worry. What was wrong with me?

I contacted my doctor A.K.A. a google search of my symptoms...sudden bitter taste in mouth. Oddly enough an article about pine nuts came up. I read of the phenomenon known as pine mouth. Multiple people 1-3 days after ingesting pine nuts experienced a bitter metalic taste with all food and drink lasting for up to 2 weeks. I looked for a remedy and found that not only does no one know the cause of pine mouth but there is not cure except to just let it run its course. I also discovered that this phenomenon seemed to be specific for the most part to pine nuts grown in china.

I was confused because the pine nuts I bought were Whole Foods own brand. Surely Whole Foods with its whole organic produce philosophy would not be importing its pine nuts from a country with the most questionable farming practices in the world? right?
I called Whole Foods and was told that all their own label foods including the pine nuts were grown here in the United States. I didn't take their word for it though. I went into the store to double check this and surely enough MADE IN CHINA was on a sticker on the back of the pine nuts.

I went online and found multiple articles on pine mouth and chinese pine nuts and like the crazy cat lady that I am, I stapled and paperclipped all the articles and walked back into whole foods and asked to speak to the manager. He of course looked at me like I was crazy and I insisted that he look at my documentation on pine mouth and that the pine nuts should have a warning or be removed from the shelves. He said he would forward the information to their corporate headquarters.

Continuing on my rampage of outrage, I wrote and email to corporate Whole Foods. Almost immediately I received a form letter response that was specific to pine mouth. Whole Foods was completely aware that they were selling a product that could make everything their customer ate for up to 2 weeks taste bitter. Unsatisfied by this form letter, I sent an email of outrage and a request that they warn customers of this issue or find another source for their pine nuts. Their response was basically that I could return the pine nuts for a refund and that they were sorry.

I now have a boycott on whole foods. Any company that would knowingly sell tainted pine nuts and have a form letter prepared to fire off at angry customers is not a company that I will ever again support with my business.

My pine mouth lasted for two weeks. The only things that tasted normal were scotch and broccoli, but I forced myself to eat the bitter tasting things instead of becoming an alcoholic cruciferous vegetable addict. Actually I already am a bit of a cruciferous vegetable addict and with the many health benefits of being one, why not?

So, consider this your warning. Something strange is going on with pine nuts. The FDA is investigating it and nobody knows what causes pine mouth, but believe me, you don't want to have it.

11 and 176 days

2010-01-11T14:44:00.000-08:00

It's 11 days since my lips have touched the sweet booze nectar, the lubricant
of conversation and the creator or casualty and miscommunication

It is 176 days since I've had a cigarette, the former object of my oral fixation.

It is too many days since I've been on a relaxing vacation.

It's about time to turn on a dime and tour the nation.

Sally

2010-01-11T14:08:00.000-08:00

Photo of & by Carrie Thomas

Sally Sells Seashells by the Seashore
She wanted to go to college
but her parents couldn't afford to send her
She went to the bank
but they didn't have money that they would lend her
so sally sells her shells in a shack by the sea
gonna save all her money
gonna move to the city...

where the cars are always beepin'
and the people are never sleepin'
and the lights are always flickerin'
in your eye eye eyes

and the sky is the limit
if you can dream it, you can have it
cuz the stars are on the street not in the sky

and even if you're starving it's romantic and it's charming
like some charlie chaplin film they used to play.
where he asks her out to dinner
but he cannot pay the waiter
and there's a fly in every soup in that cafe.

and he tells her that he loves her
and she says she'll have his babies
and they marry by the sea and then they stay.
and he builds her a little shack where she can sell her little trinkets
and it's not quite what she planned, but it's ok.

and we give up every dream we had
give up every dream we had
We give up every dream we had for love

and we give up every dream we had
give up every dream we had
gladly give up every dream we had for love

Jumble

2010-01-11T13:19:00.000-08:00

At the end of October, I travelled to Vermont and finished the final mixes on my 2nd album. I also got to spend some quality time with my very good friend Chris who lives in Burlington and to take in a couple of wonderful live shows.

After Vermont, I trekked up to Montreal Canada and did a small performance. An extremely significant consequence of my trip to Vermont and Montreal was the loss of a friend. To me this loss has felt like a death. This person with whom I took my northern trip is not dead. I think it makes it even harder, because I have never been good at letting go of people, even if those people are hurting me. I thought my sadness over this loss had passed in December, but in the last week I find myself haunted by memories. I wish I could say that the memories were bad memories of horrible things this person did, which might make sense of it all. Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on my perspective, these memories are almost all good, fun, happy memories. It is this which makes it that much harder and that much more painful for me. I find myself bombarded with flashes of a nostalgic look back at a friendship that is no more. I know that this person is still walking this earth, still there, but to me now, only as a part of my memory, a frozen sketch of moments in time, mashed together in some sort of obscene impressionistic jumble. The complexities of untangling them into some sort of cohesive fashion, sadly feel rather insurmountable.

Have You Seen Etienne?

2009-12-02T07:36:00.001-08:00

When I saw this poster for a missing hamster, my heart initially went out for the owner of said missing hamster. When I discovered that the poster was from a pole in San Francisco, other concerns came to mind. I'll let you use your imagination.

On a completely unrelated note, I am very moved by Richard Gere and his tireless efforts to free tibet from chinese tyranny.

Anyway, back to Etienne, the missing hamster. I was relieved to discover that this poster was merely a marketing material for some hamster movie. I can now sleep soundly knowing that dear etienne is not lost on the streets of San Fancisco. A huge weight has been lifted.

Experiment IV

2009-10-22T12:29:00.000-07:00

There is a song by Kate Bush that I really love a great deal called Experiment IV (video embedded below). The song is basically about a secret government project to create a weapon that uses sound to kill people.

My mind was drawn to this song today as I read about musicians who have requested a list from the US Govermnment of songs used to torture prisoners in Guantanamo Bay Cuba. Yes, we actually used music to torture people. It saddens me to think of music being used in this way. I think music can be a powerful tool for healing. As this article brings to light, the opposite is true as well.
(Read The Article)

A note about the video. One of the main doctor's is played by Dawn French. For those of you who aren't familiar, she is one half of the comedey duo French and Saunders who created the hit BBC comedy show Absolutely Fabulous. Another doctor in the video is played by a younger Hugh Laurie aka Doctor House.

cocoon

2009-10-22T08:37:00.000-07:00

cocooned in your arms,
a chrysalis of human skin
pulsing like a distant drum
warm and full
humid like the Amazon
sleepless in wonder
sleepless under cover next to lover
discovering

digitized.

2009-10-22T08:15:00.000-07:00

Photo by Carrie Thomas

The girl next to me on the train was bobbing her head back and forth, madly, almost ritualistically. The sound of the overcompressed over digitized music with its sterile sound devoid of human warmth and emotion filled the air, reflecting off her damaged eardrums. She's a maneater, whoa oh. If I can hear every word of your music, my dear, then you will soon not hear music at all. I look at the eyes of the passersby.

Your pulse is digitized.
You're plugged in to the circuitry.
You don't even realize you're plugged in to the circuitry.
gotta get out
gotta get out
gotta get
gotta get get get get get get get
Lord bless my soul. I'm going home.

The doors to the train open. the people pour out onto the platform like a dam has burst. They flow up the stairs like gravity defying water. There's a rock in the stream a woman suddenly loses the ability to move, paralyzed by the need to send a text message, oblivious to the existence of anyone else. The water diverts its course and flows around the rock.

Her pulse is digitized. She's plugged in to the circuitry.

Spring in my step Fall in the Air

2009-10-21T10:06:00.000-07:00

Photo by the very talented ms.
Carrie Thomas

There's a certain spring in my step
as in spring has sprung. I must be all
turned around, because I am ready for the flowers to bloom
just as the crisp air laced with the smell of burnt wood and apples
inundates my senses.

Having just returned from a nine day voyage, I feel changed in some strange way.
I can't quite put my finger on it, but everything around me feels bizarre, unfamiliar, different. My brain is still in Montréal where the sidewalks bustle with people speaking French in full surround sound stereo. My brain is tuned to french, making it hard for me to overhear subway conversations. My brain is trying to translate english to english and english just ends up sounding like french. I know it won't make sense to you, but it does to me.

Well, I have delightful news of things accomplished on my journey. I finished mixing my 2nd album and will soon have the tracks mastered, which then means artwork, photos, the manufacturing process, touring, press, etc. The wheel is beginning to turn. Soon things will be moving with their own life and speed, perhaps dragging me along for some interesting ride.

The tracks are as follows:
SUNRISE AT THE SPEAKEASY by ROBERT GERMAN
1. Flapjacks
2. Mamma Don't Like No Chocolate
3. Throw That Box
4. Glitters and Sparkles
5. Unplug
6. Mr. Carpentier
7. Life Was Simple
8. Chickens and Eggs
9. Duct Tape and Superglue
10. Ashes and Dust

There you have it folks... 10 songs. The album could have had 12 but 10 just felt like the right number for this one. But don't worry, b-sides are coming. How do we feel about some basement tracks? Demos and b-side? Is it too soon for such things? Do I need to Release The Ocean and The Easel first?(the working title for album #3)

You only live one life so...

2009-09-12T00:33:00.000-07:00

You might as well live it.

The impending parade

2009-09-06T21:44:00.000-07:00

as I sit at my desk staring out into an empty alley
where once a ramshackle tent had been, put there by the inhabitants
of my former basement apartment, I ponder the meaning of life.
Well, It's a constant pondering. I know at times it's as simple as
smiling when you don't want to smile and finding beauty down on the
sidewalk next to a rusted garbage can. Outside my window where once a ramshackle
tent had stood, the sounds of horns and shouting echo through the empty spaces.
It is an hour until the real adventure begins, when people will flood the streets in
costumes screaming and shouting. The streets are barricaded. The population of my
neighborhood seems to have doubled. The sidewalks are packed. It is the night before the Caribbean pride parade
and we do live in a predominantly caribbean neighborhood, so let the games begin.

benzodiazepine

2009-08-24T12:30:00.000-07:00

my body numb and tingling,
throat closed, hands trembling
I cut you half so that I don't fall asleep
benzodiazepine.

in just a few minutes my eyes will grow heavy
I'll float like an angel on a warm fluffy cloud
high above the trouble down below
high above the electric bill and the dirty clothes

my body numb and tingling
throat open, hands steady
I feel like I'm drifting off into darkness.
The sun is still shining. I'm just not ready.

A cup of tea and stubborn resistance
is all I have to keep me awake.
Imagine how I'd feel if I took the whole thing
if this is how I feel from the little I take.

Happy birthday

2009-08-23T17:21:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to Ricky.
Hope you had a wonderful birthday.

Diversions/Critters a.k.a. Cat Massage

2009-08-21T07:11:00.000-07:00

What better way to end your week than
by learning a new technique.
We're never too old to learn something new.
Today's lesson is in the art of cat massage.
I can't think of a better way to spend my time
and energy. I also couldn't imagine a better teacher than this woman.

30 Days

2009-08-18T07:20:00.000-07:00

Today is 30 days of not smoking.
Let's just call it a month.
Yay!

Waiting to Inhale

2009-08-17T08:23:00.000-07:00

This is my old familiar friend, the albuterol inhaler. I used to carry one of these around with me all the time to deal with both allergy and exercise induced asthma. Well, I think I may have gotten to the bottom of this whole panic attack thing. The doctor I saw on Thursday gave me a new inhaler but told me that if I was having panic attacks then the inhaler would make them worse, so I have not been using it. Well, on Saturday, I was having a bit of labored breathing and decided to try the inhaler. In fact, I found that I could breathe again. It seems that perhaps my quitting smoking has brought back my asthma. The combination of stress, allergies and my lungs purging themselves of crud has gotten me to this place of having trouble breathing. The trouble breathing is causing me to have panic attacks. So, I am back to carrying around this little friend and hopefully I have found the root of the problem, so that I can tackle the world unhindered by a lack of air and a feeling of panic.

Day 26

2009-08-14T08:13:00.000-07:00

I have not had a cigarette for 26 days.
However, I'm now on anxiety medication.
Life is a give and take. Time to explore new ways
of releasing my tension.

Panic at the Disco

2009-08-14T07:47:00.000-07:00

Ok, so this title isn't exactly the best to describe this post but it will have to do. This has nothing to do with disco. It has nothing to do with the band Panic at the Disco whose music I don't know, though I'm sure it's totally awesome and stuff.

Yesterday I had a panic attack, the third bad one in three weeks. The first attack happened on a crowded train. I ended up getting out of the train 4 stations before my stop because I couldn't breathe. It felt like I was having a heart attack. I climbed up the subway steps and suddenly I could breathe, so I waited for another train to come thinking I was ok. A train pulled into the station packed full of people. When I looked at the crowded train, suddenly it started again. Just thinking of being on the train took my breath away. I ended up walking home after calling Konstantine completely freaking out. He met me and walked with me.

I used to think panic attacks were something people made up, a sort of fake disorder used to get drugs from a doctor or draw attention to ones self. I now know that they are a very real very scary thing. Yesterday, I truly could not breath. It felt like I was going to die. My fingers started to go numb and tingling. I ended up in a clinic hooked up to an EKG, had my blood pressure checked twice, my breathing listened to via stethoscope back and front multiple times, had three viles of blood drawn, etc. My EKG was normal though my heart rate was a bit fast. My hands were shaking. My blood pressure was high. My temperature was normal. The doctor told me that I am having panic attacks and prescribed anti anxiety medication. I started to have another panic attack this morning but was able to calm myself down and stop it from getting as bad as yesterday. I played happy music in my head and focused on the music. My throat and begun to tighten and I was getting to a place where it was hard to breathe, but I just focused on the music and let it be the only thing that existed. My hands were shaking, but I kept my focus on the music and it brought me back. I refuse to let this take hold of me and turn me into an agoraphobic who can't leave the house or deal with crowds. It seems that most of the attacks have happened on crowded trains, in crowded grocery stores, etc. I am going to try my best to get to a place of calm and relaxation. Knock on Wood, this too shall pass.

I just have to tell myself Don't Panic

Most Awesome Headline Ever!

2009-08-13T08:48:00.001-07:00

"Nun Chases Robber(t) Into Woods"

Extra Extra Read all about it.

Death of a Harddrive a new play in two parts

2009-08-12T12:11:00.000-07:00

A couple of years back, my laptop stopped working very suddenly without any warning at all. I self diagnosed the problem as a failed hard drive. Despite my friends' pleading and apprehension, I decided to fix the computer myself. I have never been so nervous, sweat so much or seen so many tiny screws in my life. I managed to successfully replace the hard drive on my laptop and get it back up and running. It felt like a real victory. At that time, the true loss was the data on the hard drive. I was living from sofa to sofa doing shows promoting my album and everything was in storage. I did not have an external backup of my data so everything was lost.

As a result, I bought an external hard drive and another one to back that one up. Well, I must not have truly learned my lesson because tragically over the weekend my external hard drive died. I had just moved a bunch of files temporarily to that drive because I was out of room on my laptop and the other drive. In my long list of to dos for the week was the purchase of an additional drive to back everything up. Unfortunately, death came to my hard drive before I was able to do that.

I have lost music that I was working on, but oddly I am not freaking out. I am trying to work with the company that makes the drive to see if it is an issue where the data may still be recoverable. If it is a failure to the power part of the drive only, then this is a possibility. If not, then sadly I will have to start from scratch on a couple of songs. Luckily 90% of my music is on another hard drive which is still operational. I am waiting for the arrival of another drive tomorrow and I will back that 90% up onto that. The one good thing is that even if the drive that died is completely dead it is still under warranty so the worst case scenario is that I will be given a replacement drive.

As someone told me when my laptop died... "It is not a matter of IF your hard drive will fail. It is a matter of when."

Always back up the data that is important to you. It could happen at any time.

It's a broken hard drive. I know what to do. I just need some duct tape and superglue.

Diversions: Roisen Murphy

2009-08-12T09:12:00.000-07:00

I must admit that when I was first exposed to Roisen Murphy I was less than impressed.
I have sence begun to shift or rather clarify my view. She is a very talented live performer but I am not crazy about the style of production used on much of her recorded material. Regardless, I am completely transfixed by this performance of her song Ramalama Bang Bang. Enjoy

You can learn about the former singer for Moloko by visiting her website.

Woman - Hear Her Roar? or Open The Door!

2009-08-12T08:23:00.000-07:00

A strange thing happened in September of 1968. A protest against the miss America pageant literally eurupted into groups of women burning their bras (among other things).
This was one stop on the long bumpy road toward equality for women, which many argue is still going on to this day. A mere 4 years later in 1972 a young woman named Helen Reddy shot to the top of the billboard music charts with a song titled "I am Woman" as in I am woman hear me roar. The song became an anthem of solidarity for many women at the time.

I am by no means a historian or expert on the women's movement. Yes, I know these are only two instances, blips if you will in a long struggle towards equality for women. It's a struggle that has become convoluted to some extent in a post feminist world.

There are two questions I would like to pose and I will clarify shortly. Can women be treated equally to men? (and) Do all women really want to be?

I know there are some women who feel completely content and fulfilled baking cookies, ironing shirts and driving the children to soccer practice. If that is their choice, that is perfectly fine. There are still others who wish to grab the corporate world by the balls, fly into outer space, become professional body builders, or even run for president. Recently we saw the confirmation of Sonia Sotomayor as a justice for the US Supreme Court. She is only the third female justice to hold that honored position. Still it is progress.

So, the two questions I have posed were presented with a promise for clarification. Here goes. There is one thing I have never understood and that thing is this idea of chivalry. If women wish to be treated equally to men in society (as they should be), then why is it not offensive to them that men open doors for them, give them seats on the subway, let them walk out of the elevator first. It's the strangest thing to me. It makes no sense.

To me, seeing a man open a door for a woman comes with an implication of weakness. as though a woman is too feable to open the door for herself and needs a man to do it for her. My one exception to this thought is when it involves an older woman for example with a cane or a walker or a woman who is pushing a baby stroller and fighting with a door. That also goes for a man with a cane or walker or a man with a stroller. To me, yes opening the door for someone is a very sweet polite thing to do, but this whole idea of men specifically opening doors for women bothers me. Perhaps it doesn't bother women. I have not seen a woman once complain or see it in this way or at least expressed such feelings to me.

I have been given dirty looks by people on the subway because I sat in one open seat and there is a perfectly healthy able bodied woman standing there. It's as if I have slapped that woman. Why should that woman be more entitled to that seat? Why am I being rude when I am merely treating that woman the same way that I would treat a man? Should I treat her as weak and feable and give her the seat? I'd rather see her as strong. In these instances I find an inconsistency which to mean is in conflict with feminist principles.

So, should women have their cake and eat it too? Is it I am woman hear me roar? Is it, I am woman, open the door? Is it both?

One Foot in front of the other

2009-08-12T07:40:00.000-07:00

Photo by the deliciously noteworthy Ms. Carrie Thomas

Well, I am quickly approaching a month of not smoking. It is day 24.
Thus far it has definitely had it's ups and downs.
This week, I'm finding that I'm dealing with some shortness of breath
and insomnia. I know that it will pass. I've been walking a lot in the evening to try and push my way through the stress. I think I've walked around 11 miles in the last two days. It is the evening when I most want a cigarette. Instead I have been trudging through the city despite the fact that we are going through a full on heat wave. I end up returning home drenched in sweat, but I know it is therapeutic for me right now. I changed the inner tubes on my bike as the tires wouldn't stay inflated. I'm going to start biking soon and get back into running. All of these are things which I know are a good replacement for the cigarettes and a step in the right direction for my desire to acheive some renewed sense of physical fitness. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other. I am ready to tackle the world with renewed strength and purpose.

Cooking and Cleaning and Scrubbing the Tub

2009-08-03T12:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went into a cleaning frenzy the likes of which hasn't been seen in our apartment in quite some time. I enlisted the help of K and dove headfirst into an all day scrub fest. Bucket of bleach and soap with yellow rubber glove in tow, I scrubbed every inch of tile and swept like a crazy person. We gave the apartment a very thorough head to toe cleaning. We took a break to make a brunch of sorts with poached eggs, steamed spinach, oatmeal and my good friend bacon.

We completely rearranged the living room which does double duty as my office/editing suite. We decided to part with two chairs that the cat has basically destroyed. They were these beautiful danish midcentury modern molded plywood chairs that someone had thrown into the trash. K and I had found them when we first started dating and he helped me carry them home. We carried both chairs out to the curb and ashes to ashes, dust to dust, the cycle was complete and they returned to the place from where they once came. There is a new zen quality to the space and everything is so much more open and flowing. It feels good to get rid of some of the clutter and get the space to a place where it can breath again.

The desk used to face a wall and now it faces a window. It seems so much more inspiring to sit looking out the window rather than staring at the cold plaster wall.

I feel like I'm going through my own personal spring. Doing the spring cleaning and preparing for my own garden to start blossoming. Lord knows it feels like spring with how much rain we've been getting. It never seems to stop. I know it will soon enough though. There are good things ahead.

Day 15

2009-08-03T07:32:00.001-07:00

I promise that the Rant has not turned into a glorified quit smoking log, just a temporary one. Today is a day of note, Day 15 of not smoking. This marks the beginning of week 3 in my journey. I'm settling into a comfortable place and feeling like I'm going to make it.

Day 12 is sponsored by bacon

2009-07-31T07:43:00.001-07:00

Nothing says I love you
like a sizzling plate full of crispy delicious pig candy.

Welcome to day 12 of my life without cigarettes.
I'd like to take this time to thank our sponsor
for day 12... Bacon.

Just what the doctor ordered.

9 out of 10 doctors recommend fried bacon as an important
part of any healthy balanced diet.***

***Any claims of health benefits from bacon and all statistics regarding them are purely the ficticious creation and malinformed opinion of the author of this post. Prolonged exposure to bacon and/or bacon fat may cause cancer, birth defects, chronic diarrhea, migraine headaches, anal bleeding and miscarriage. Children under 3 should only be given bacon under close adult supervision with the recommendation of a board certified physician. In some individuals bacon may cause a rare but serious condition
known as bacon fever. If you experience foaming at the mouth, irrational anger, paranoia or night tremors, please contact your local poison control center.

Day 11

2009-07-30T08:35:00.000-07:00

Well, it's day 11 of nonsmoking and I am delighted to say that it is going pretty well. I feel most anxious at night and took two tylenol PM pills to ensure restful sleep. I have definitely experienced a bit of grogginess as a result this morning.

For the most part I have not wanted to smoke, but when I looked at this photo of the broken cigarette it made my heart beat quickly and lustfully. It's strange how a simple image can illicit such a strong physical response.

Also, I am on day 4 of no coffee. I've replaced it with tea. I've been feeling oddly calm and a bit giddy. I feel very optimistic about life right now. I read a bit more of the artist's way and embark on a journey of artistic exploration starting next week. It's a bright new leaf to turn over and one that is long overdue.

The Djembe Man

2009-07-29T08:29:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I find myself scared of my dreams.
It makes me scared of sleeping. It makes me stay up late
drinking and thinking and avoiding drifting away.
Last night I went to bed early and drifted into the land of dreams.
I found myself greeted by a very smiley man. I was in an African instrument shop.
I started by playing the djembe and he asked me why I was so fascinated with the djembe and told me that he had many other instruments that made even more interesting sounds.
He kept bringing me instruments to play.
There is a drumshop/African instrument shop over on Union Street and 4th avenue. I have been meaning to go into it for months. I want to explore the use of alternate instrumentation, specifically African instruments for the third album.

I know, first things first, I have to polish up the 2nd album, package it and finally share it with the world.

but for now, here are some of the sounds in my head that will be shaping some of the upcoming music.

Day 10

2009-07-29T08:22:00.001-07:00

Well, It's day 10 of nonsmoking. Last night I felt for the first time very anxious and agitated like there was something missing. I drank orange juice to calm my nerves and went to bed early. I feel like my lungs are starting to purge a bit, which isn't the most comfortable sensation, but I know it will pass soon.

Whoo Hoo! Day 10!

As part of my turning over of a new leaf I picked up a book that has been on our shelves collecting dust. It is called The Artist's Way and has been given rave reviews by my friends who have read it. Though, from my understanding thus far, only having gotten through the introduction, it's more of a course on self discovery and unblocking one's creativity as an artist than it is just a straight read. It should be interesting to see what comes from such self exploration. Hopefully it will act as some sort of plunger for my artistic plumbing. I am ready to dive in and find out.

Day 9

2009-07-28T07:49:00.000-07:00

"Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times. " - Mark Twain

Here we go again. I am on day 9 of quitting smoking. I have lost count of how many times I've quit. My last long stretch was for 3 years. Then, a big ball of stress came rolling into my life and my knee jerk reaction was to pick up a cigarette, which led to another which led to another which led to a pack, which led to an addiction. Well, We had a friend staying with us in our apartment and all three of us got a cold at the same time. I'm just now getting over it thanks to lots of water and mucinex and homeopathic remedies. I cannot praise the power of chicken soup and cayenne pepper enough.

I developed a very nasty cough, as did my friend who smokes. K did not develop the cough, most likely because he does not smoke. I was forced to put down the cigarettes because I could not breathe. I think I would still be coughing had I not put them down. My friend is still smoking and on antibiotics and is still coughing a great deal. I had a panic attack on the train the other day because it was so crowded and I could not cough and I needed to and by supressing it, I started having an asthma attack on top of the congestion. I ran out of the subway and out onto the street near the bridge and called K, totally freaking out. I couldn't get back on the train, so we walked for a bit until I calmed down.

So, it's day 9 and I have barely even missed smoking. I don't crave the cigarettes like I normally do at this point in the quitting process. I am going to keep my determination and kick this nasty habit. I like breathing and right now I am breathing better than I have in months. I'm sure my singing voice and my lungs will thank me for this.

an angry toothfish is swimming in my stomach

2009-07-27T10:48:00.000-07:00

You learn something new every day if you keep your eyes and ears open. Today for instance I learned that there is no such thing as chilean seabass. Yes, stop the presses. I know your dreams are shattered and you feel just as let down and lied to as I feel at this moment. Chilean seabass is in fact the sexy name given to the rather unfortunate looking patagonian toothfish which isn't even a bass.

I had never sampled the pleasures of patagonian toothfish until someone got my order wrong just a few minutes ago and gave me the little critter instead of salmon. I decided to just suck it up and try something new. It was nothing to write home about but didn't really upset my stomach or anything.

That is until I opened my web browser and saw this.

I now have an angry patagonian toothfish thrashing around in my tum tum.
I will try to summon my comfort animal and an artificial forcefield of zen.
If that fails there's always the backup plan of tums and a ginger tea.

internetless

2009-07-20T06:46:00.000-07:00

We have been without internet service for over a week.
Communication has come to a grinding hault.
Hopefully we'll be up and running very soon.(crossing fingers),

Apocalypse over Manhattan?

2009-06-29T12:15:00.000-07:00

This place is starting to feel like a funeral home. Yes, I know Billy Mays the oxyclean guy died, but I can't bring myself to post one more R.I.P. on here. Sorry Billy.
Not to mention Ed McMahon. Who would have every thought that cracked out Amy Winehouse would have outlived them all?

On Friday, after being soaked to the bone in a rainstorm, I paid a visit to the lovely Ms. Beverly and listened to old records as we tend to do. As I was leaving, we were both commenting on the beautiful light reflecting the sunset from a neighboring building. When I reached the street, I knew something was fishy, because people had stopped their cars and were hanging out their windows taking pictures of the sky.

I looked up and about peed my pants. It looked like a scene from the movie ghostbusters and I was sure that the Stay Puffed Marshmallow man was about to come stomping down the avenue crushing pedestrains and cars like ants. The image for this posting was taken by my camera, but to get a better idea of what was going on check out this great compilation of photos taken during the same evening.

I was unaware that there is a type of clouds called mammatus clouds. You learn something new every day.

R.I.P.Michael Jackson(1958-2009)

2009-06-29T11:21:00.000-07:00

Well, the rumors were indeed true and Michael Jackson did in fact die last week from Cardiac arrest, though the factors that may have led to that are yet to be determined after one inconclusive autopsy and another underway.

It is so strange, the feeling in the air. I keep hearing Michael's music blasting out of car windows and bleeding from people's headphones in elevators. He was a musical genius and a tortured, misunderstood soul.

I have found myself defending him in conversations that bring up his various legal issues many relating to his unusually close relationships with children. He was never convicted of a crime related to pedophilia or child molestation, but he has been convicted multiple times in the eyes of many.

I have read articles about Michael where he discussed performing at the tender young age of 6 years old when his father would beat him and emotionally abuse him. I have read of his longing to just have a childhood, something he was never allowed. I think he must have lived a very strange and lonely existence. I hope that he is now at peace.

"Before I would hurt a child, I would slit my wrists. " -Michael Jackson

?RIP? Michael Jackson????!!!?

2009-06-25T15:09:00.001-07:00

Does TMZ know something the rest of us don't?

R.I.P.Farrah Fawcett(1947-2009)

2009-06-25T10:22:00.000-07:00

As a child I adored the show Charlie's Angels.
Sadly today one of its stars, Farrah Fawcett died
after a three year battle with cancer.
my thoughts and much love go out to her family and friends
at this difficult time. May they find peace and acceptance for their loss.

Ceiling

2009-06-23T07:50:00.001-07:00

Show me a picture of the ceiling in your old apartment.
I have hidden memories there.

Manscaping

2009-06-23T07:01:00.000-07:00

We live in a brave new world where straight men known as metrosexuals get their
bikini line waxed and their eyebrows tamed a la asian threading.
Formerly the domain of women, plucking, shaving, tweezing and waxing are now commonplace among men.
Some men though need guidance. Perhaps this instructional video from Gillette is a good starter course.

Tomorrow is Far

2009-06-22T09:44:00.000-07:00

I am a huge fan of Regina Spektor.
She is adorably quirky and skillfully witty as a songwriter.
Her latest album is scheduled for release Tomorrow and is titled Far.
You can stream the entire album on NPR's website.

Success is a tricky thing. Many musicians begin their careers with a unique style that becomes more homogenized and commercialized over time. Record labels find these beautiful rough gems and then sand them down until there is barely anything left that is individual or recognizable. Regina Spektor is her own brand of wacky and heartwarming with a view of the world that often reminds the listener of a child's view of the world. I have not yet had the chance to listen to all of Far, but I do fear for Regina Spektor and her music that she is at risk as the beautiful gem that she is of being commercialized to a point that compromises her artistry. I hope this is not the case as I have immense respect for her talent and her ability to craft songs that at times successfully break my heart.

Meredith Monk- Churchyard Entertainment

2009-06-22T09:38:00.001-07:00

I was recently at the apartment of Mr. Carpentier discussing all manner of things when he mentioned this woman, Meredith Monk whose work he had seen performed at Jacob's Pillow in the Berkshires. I have a fondness for the Berkshires, having visited there at the age of 13. Coming from Kansas at the time, it was like a cultural treasure chest.

Anyhoo, Meredith Monk is a musician, filmaker, dancer, choreographer, etc. etc.
I think there is such an amazing humor reflected in the piece below. It reminds me a bit of Monty Python, but is brilliant in its own right.

I present to you Churchyard Entertainment from Book of Days.

To explore Meredith's work further, you can visit her website:
meredithmonk.org

A Slow Day For News

2009-06-12T11:14:00.000-07:00

Nothing of any importance must have happened today. I clicked on CNN's Website to see if anything had exploded or if there was some new strain of goat flu perhaps. Maybe Miley Cyrus had gotten a tattoo or Paris Hilton had stopped using the word hot to describe everything. What I discovered from my brief adventure in pointing and clicking my way toward pounding a few nails in print journalism's coffin was that one of CNN's top headlines was "Dog Eats Bag of Pot, Gets High".

It's great to know that CNN is tackling the really important stories that shape all of our lives. It's thought provoking journalism like this that restores my faith in the integrity of mainstream news.

Daddy (lyrics)

2009-06-09T10:52:00.000-07:00

Hookers and Booze
no matter which way you choose
you know you're gonna lose.
You're gonna lose.

you've got car wrecks
and credit card debts
and fingers stained from cigarettes
and I've got the blues in 5,000 hues.

Daddy
I don't want to be your
Daddy
I don't need to be your
Daddy
you're supposed to be my
Daddy

Daddy
I don't want to be your
Daddy
I don't need to be your
Daddy
you're supposed to be my
Daddy

Stick a quarter in the slot
for every minute you would like the bed to purr
with your new her
cheap motels ain't got whistles or bells
but you seem to thing that you have found the cure
Don't be so sure.

Daddy
I don't want to be your
Daddy
I don't need to be your
Daddy
you're supposed to be my
Daddy

Daddy
I don't want to be your
Daddy
I don't need to be your
Daddy
you're supposed to be my
Daddy

600 miles (excerpt)

2009-05-28T11:11:00.000-07:00

Thank you for coming to the show
It means more to me than you will ever know.
I travelled 600 miles just to tune my guitar
for the men playing pool and the ladies laughing at the bar

but you listened to every word that I said.
You offered me a ride and a beer and a bed
you told me I'm amazing and I promise it won't go to my head.

Thank you for the letter that you wrote.
I've been strugglin' just to keep myself afloat
I had rocks in my sweater and I was goin' for a swim
when she handed me your letter I was drownin' over him

but your words pulled me back from the tide
from the place where my fears and my failures collide.
I might have swallowed half the ocean just to wash down the taste of my pride

Empty Hands

2009-05-20T09:35:00.000-07:00

You drink too much
I know because I do too
I recognize the bleary eyes that belong to you.
you resent the forgetting
blaming me for pointing out the points that were upsetting
when you howl at the sky
when the dark side rises out of your skin
again and again
like clockwork
a knee jerk reaction to something deep within your bones
something still unknown but always there, staring me in the face.
I am standing farther away, trying to keep the demons at bay
but missing the person that they inhabit.
trying to explain, but you won't have it.
your ears are filled with sand.
your heart is torn in strands.
your plate is full
but empty hands

Common Cement

2009-05-19T13:54:00.001-07:00

To pull you from the flames

2009-05-19T12:20:00.000-07:00

To pull you from the flames of love gone wrong
would take a giant and I am not that strong.
you wipe your lips
they smell of kerosine and feed the flames
for only you unseen.

Perfection, not a virtue I would fit
to ask of you would I turn hypocrite?
I stand aside and watch the clouds of smoke
I offer water and but still you choose to choke.

2 Years

2009-05-19T11:23:00.000-07:00

2 years ago today I had just moved into a basement apartment. I was sleeping on a blowup mattress and the floor had just been finished so I was dealing with a constant nausea that comes from breathing in fumes. I had just finished a stint of sleeping on people's sofas for over a year, traveling like a wandering gypsy, bags and guitar in tow. The blowup mattress was a big step up.

I rushed with my guitar and equipment to a show held at Cadman Plaza in Brooklyn for Marriage Equality New York. As everything was being setup,I spied a boy in tight jeans with nice legs and very cute floppy ears. I told my friend that he would be my boyfriend. I of course never made eye contact or tried to approach him. It was more of a joke. I had given up on dating. My life at that point in fact did not even leave room for flirtation. I was content with and resigned to being alone.

I performed a set as my self while two dragqueen friends, Chic and Sassy held umbrellas over my head to sheild me and my guitar from the rain. Then, I performed a set as Kitt & Kaboodle, my cabaret alter-ego with Jeff Cubeta. I was packing up my guitar and winding down when I was approached by a tight jean wearing floppy eared boy. He asked if I had a mailing list. I said yes, but I had rushed and didn't have it with me. He seemed dejected. Was he flirting with me? I was impervious to such things and oblivious perhaps, but hopeful. Maybe I wasn't content with being alone. I had seen him earlier walking around with a microphone followed by a camera crew. I asked him what they were filming for and he told me it was for a television show produced by the LGBT community center. I gave him my email address and told him to email me to let me know when the show aired. (this is the short version, btw. He left and then came back minutes later. I thought I had scared him away...and the whole throughout the whole situation I was very confused with his intentions...if it was flirtation, professional networking...I had no clue.)

I received an an email a few days later

"Hello, Im the guy with the camera from the marriage rally. The show
will be airing the third thursday of June in Manhattan on time warner
34 at 1030 and some other time on BCAT. You can also watch it online
at gaycenter.org/out.
Also if you ever want to grab a coffee or something that would be great."

I responded:

"Hey Konstantine (a.k.a. guy with the camera)

Thanks for the info. I don't own a television, so I'll
have to check it out on the website.

I am always up for grabbing a coffee or something. If
that something involves an old wooden rollercoaster in
Coney Island or a game of pool, even better.
I'm free Thursday evening,this friday from 2-4pm or after
8pm(very specific, I know), and then I'm in Minneapolis
doing a show, but I'll be back on Monday."

I will spare you the details and just say, the rest is history.
Two year later, I'm engaged to a floppy eared boy who looks quite hot in tight jeans.
oh and he is smart and sweet and kind and gentle and all that stuff... If you need a puke bucket, I totally understand.

Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus

2009-05-15T14:31:00.000-07:00

Occasionally a movie comes along that is so horribly bad that it's amazingly awesome. One of those is Coffy with Pam Grier, an absolute classic in my book.
The question is, Can Deborah (Debbie electric youth) Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas pull off the so horrible it's amazingly snakes on a plane good with their newest picture Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus. It's a challenging balancing act. You watch the trailer and decide.

btw, if this does not go straight to DVD, I am so going to the theater to see this. That is no joke. Who's with me?

remember these?

2009-05-07T10:29:00.001-07:00