at times you carried me
at times I carried you
at times we leaned on each other to keep our collective balance, you see
somewhere along the way though your grip began to tighten
I notice the bruises on my arm
How long have those been there?
It hurts I say to myself but those bruises are just the proof of how much you need me
I must be there for you despite the hurt, despite the marks accumulating on my body
a tiny cut, this littlest prick of thorns, my body scraped against the brambles to help
you keep your balance
step my step death by a thousand paper cuts I once heard them say
I cry out, I am bleeding
"oh I know" you say,
"I feel the same way" you say
your feelings are my feelings
nothing is yours
it is all an extension of me
there is only me
no thee
no we
me
me
me
smaller and smaller I shrink
I shrink to fit the spaces you allow me to occupy
I stand two inches tall on the ground so close to your shoe
"that size will do"
I live on your crumbs
strategically thrown to keep me alive when I'm just about to die
shrinking to nothing
walking gingerly in the way you have taught me
avoiding your disapproval
We come to a place in our journey where the path splits
I must walk in my own direction
and you must walk in yours
for I am two inches tall and the space you have allowed
for me is only one inch tall
it is an impossibility of physics
and I cannot shrink myself down
so small
my current hunger requires more than crumbs and living under your thumb
I wish you well
